You often find …

You often find what you want the moment you discover what you don’t need.
~ t.p.p.

Time To Let Go

I must love myself enough
To forgive myself for all
The wrong I did in my past.

I know that when you look
At me all you can see are
The shadows of the boy
I used to be and if I am
To be honest I did to.

But this fusing and fighting
Over whose sin’s weighs
The most is pointless
I can’t live in the gutters
I was risen from
I asked forgiveness.

And received an answer
Upon a whisper of wind
Telling me to keep on
Marching that this trail
Was nothing but another
Weight which will
Make me stronger.

I picked up the shards of
My love and moved forward
Although I didn’t see your face
Anymore my heart never stopped
Longing for you.

I prayed harder for peace for
My heart because it refused
To believe you never could
Love me beyond the strain.

However, this last time when
You attempted to take away
My freedom with those
Unforgiving chains.

My heart accepted the hard truth
And urged me to leave so that
It could be free from the emotional abuse.
My brain wanted to say I told you so
But choose to focus on making the
Escape so that the complete me
Can began to heal my heart now sees
That I must learn to love myself.

It is for this reason that I now
Open my eyes and appreciate that
It is time to let go.

Forgiven By Me

I think it’s time to lay it all on the line
I going to expose the inner madness
That led me to enjoy the summer sun
So much more.

The pain from both the personal and
Inner abuse has been chased away
The rain waters have come and
Exposed a canvas of pure white that
I intend to fill with endless colors.

I once allowed the words of others
To take the place of my pride and
In doing so I felt like I had died
I cried tears that no one could see.

I am a man not by age but due to
The trails that I survived along
The way if it had not been for
Love saving and raising me
Then I might not have discovered
How to use hope to pull me back
From the edge of insanity.

I could have been so many negative things
By now to be truthful I never saw being
Reborn as one of them however,
Here I stand not only forgiven by God but
Also forgiven by me.